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Sometimes I wish I had a shoulder to lean on as opposed to depending on myself to keep myself from going off the edge.Complicated already? There have been countless times where I have cried to myself for hours, sure I looked pathetic but what else was there to do? When am I going to get the privilege to just let all of these tied up emotions go.Out of my mouth and into someone's ear that actually gives a damn.I'm always the one to listen to someone's problems or I'm the one that must to maintain this facade for the sake of another's comfort or happiness. What about me? Who do I get? Will I always feel virtually alone? Reality is the one thing that I don't know how I've managed to continue for so long. Honestly, I'm not even sure what keeps me going,......maybe the thought that something will turn out for the best. I just wish someone would tell me that they're proud of me and I'm doing the right thing instead of the mistake few people think I'm making.It's to late to turn back now and I intend to see it to the end.....Question. How are you suppose to love something that is sucking the life out of your relationship,the very reason for your existence( yes twilight shit). Next Question. Can I ? Or will I wait to accept the inevitable and be but a distant memory. Either way I don't win so why make the choice and be unhappy for the remainder of the time we have together.

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