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I hate it when you walk in a room and people stare.And you think booger,is my hair sticking up,is there something on my face?No.then what is it?Why do people insist on profiling someone they don't even know.People look you up and down.Some even determine they're better than you.Without even having a conversation.Girls give you that look and make that sound I call it the "Ghetto Grunt",that hmm who the fuck is she/him.Guys don't really pay attention unless there's a pretty girl in front of them.It's So annoying .

So I'm in the car and my moms going on one of her bitchy rampages about how I isolate myself in my room.She thinks I need to spend more time with this chaotic family.(Mind you that all this is going on in the car so any chance of me pretending I didn't hear her went out the window).She said that we don't talk like we used to,and then some other shit.So finally I just told her "Why don't you leave me alone and go find some friends".She shut up for like two seconds and started talking about having friends.So I told her "Then why don't you make plans with them instead of forcing your fifteen year old daughter to hang out with you."

You know I should have apologized but I didn't because I don't find the need.So I guess her punishment was dragging me to Busch Gardens with her tomorrow.I don't want to go though.Busch Gardens is so fucking boring.Thanks Mom.You put a smile on my face.

I'm a little confused as to what triggered my decisions to move on and abort certain "missions" in my mess I call a life.Maybe it was when I realized that all the work I put in to this guy erased itself as soon as he clicked the log in button on Myspace.Or the fact that no matter what I did or said that our so called relationship would never be legit.Or was it was when I finally met someone who actually calls me just to talk instead of when he wants something and tells me i'm pretty even when I don't feel like I am.Instead of digging through the "Laughs and Cries" to find the exuberance in a so-called bond I find myself genuinely happy .Which makes it worth all the crap I've been through.OhSoWonderful Relations

July 26 Smiles



Surprisingely today was pretty good based on the fact that it was spent with my ridiculous family .First we went to Michael's (the art store) to go look at absolutely nothing .The only thing my mom got was gum.Come on mom,you could've went to Wawa's for that.Then we got in the car just so my mom could say "Kiani I want some more gum go back in and get me some." What the fuck?So I did and the guy looked at me like I was retarded.Thanks Mom....So much.You really boosted my self esteem.Anyway,we went to Chiles and had to wait an hour just so my retarded sisters could say" i'm not hungry anymore" .Oh my goodness they drive me crazy.That's pretty much it .Bye for now.

A guy isn't a business you
shouldn't have to take a number.He should
put you at the front of his EXPRESS line.
If he's making you wait you might want to try somewhere else where it's less busy.
-Kiani-

What kind of boyfriend do you want? The Slacker,the guy who doesn't do anything and yet expects everything and more.The so to speak Fat person in the relationship,the big daddy do nothing, Mr. 5/95.Or would you rather have Mr. 50/50.The guy who meets you half way in every aspect of your relationship .Dates,Phone Calls,Text Messages,Chill Time.You name it he should be there.

Not for you well there's always Mr. 88/12.The one who insist on planning every part of your companionship,only to let you decide on a few minor details.Which one do you want?Think about it.

I hate girls who use the term ,wifey.I mean I thought everyone was over that "I'm wifey" phase.Obviously I was wrong.It's still on Myspace all these girls with there wifey pictures it's so wack.Why can't we just say girlfriend .I mean what the fuck.Another pointless post :) Just for you.

Have you ever just stumbled across something that you obviously weren't suppose to see? Somebody trying to keep a little secret.You getting that mental punch to the face .The wind being knocked out of you.Trying to choke back your sobs and for what the asshole behind all this.Is it worth your time?No.And yet you bestow precious seconds,minutes and hours on one person for what? To be crushed by their pretensions of who they really are.Nothings meant to be remember that .

How To sort out losers from that dream guy.
  1. Know what you want
  2. Don't settle for less
  3. Listen to your friends they always have your best interest,even when HE doesn't
  4. Mistakes are okay just learn,don't repeat
  5. Watch for the typical douche bag and avoid him

I hate meeting new people just to be forgotten the next day.I mean it isn't that hard to remember a name of someone you've had at least three conversations with.I remember most of the people i've talked to in the last 15 years of my existence?Shows how important I am right? Common Courtesy people!!!!! I mean take the effort.

I have like the most pointless post ever.My sister and I were watching Forest Gump .Everyone knows the part when he sitting on the bench and says "Life is like a box of chocolate you never know what you're gonna get".So being the "argumentalist" we are, we decided that that line was "politically incorrect" or something like that.Life is not like a fucking box of chocolate because you always know what you're gonna get just read the damn label.Too bad you can't do that with life or you could just pick your dream life.So in your face Tom Hanks .

Mistakes Made.I have a few.Some you probably wouldn't guess ,but I don't regret any of them even if I should.Responsibility? I'll take it.It's just that I make so many "Faux pas" that all that responsibility would break me in half. No scratch that fourths.(boys,school,friends,and family).Hmm sometimes It's just too much to handle alone.

Boyfriends are great right.? Even guys that are just friends are good right.?Well, what about spending time with them.That's cool.Movies.Mall.Beach.Yeah.So does this mean you have a life.Does a guy give you a life?Wanna find out here's what you do.Write a list of everything you do with your friends(boyfriends included).Now when you're finished count what you have on the list.Then,cross off everything you do with your significant other.How many things are left on your list.Which one outweighs which. If your "Sweetheart" does then we have a problem.Congratulation!!! you are an official Friend Deserter.Hooray!!! for you.Nope not so Hooray.Think about it how would you feel if your friend kept ditching you.Hmm. Breaking plans because "Bobby" decided some spur of the moment crap.It's one thing to have your space it's another to block your space.I'm not saying you should keep the Companionship having to minimum but have time for your girls because no matter what the boyfriend says(babe I want to be with you forever)*I detect some bullshit*your girlfriends will always be there even when he drops you for somebody prettier. :)


Well it's been one of those days.A Family Day.Ugh.They're the worst.My mom,my Ohsowonderful mom decided that we would all go to the movies to see Imagine That.I was fine with that.We were going to the movies on the base so the risk of being seen was very slim.After the movie my mom decided to go on one of her retarded adventures and somehow we ended up going to the beach.It was boring and I got so sick of watching fat guys and their boobs flapping around.Nasty.Finally,just when I thought we were going home we stopped at Toys R Us.What the fuck do we need at
Toys R Us.Waste of my Saturday.Another Pointless blog.

As most of you know I got the title from "The Dark Knight" .What does it mean ?It means you can't always sit on you're ass and wait for some miracle to happen because odds are it won't.You want something to happen,it's up to you to make sure that it does.If you want to wait, by all means be my guess,be that loser.Me? I got tired of letting "fate" handle my life.Have you?

So I'm on the blog search page on Google to find a new blog to possibly follow.Unfortunately all I got was depressed.Reading entries about dying and cutting really takes a toll on you.One thing i've noticed is how the titles are all the same "the day in the life of" and then there's some sort of teen word in there.Ugh, it was so annoying 30 pages of teens discussing their problems that half of the world could care less about."OMG I hate my mom" has been a number one line.It's stupid.Get a fucking life.

How does it feel to cry?Do you ever tell yourself not to? To hold it in.Restricted tears.Sometimes you just can't help it.Sometimes the tears just escape. Spill out uncontrollably.Do you stop yourself?

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Guys are so ..........I don't even know.I can't even pinpoint the one problem that makes them suck so much ass.Why would you pretend to be something/someone you're not.You let something go on for so long just to ruin it with out a word.You make her feel special just to treat her like crap in then end.Her friends tell her you're no good but they see how much you make her happy so they slowly adapt the fact that you're staying.She has that feeling in the back of her head that somethings wrong but ignores it because she "thinks" this is what shes been waiting for.You spend i'm sorry "waste" your time with her (shit you even tell her that you love her.).Is it out of pity or are you just getting tired of her and ready to get a new toy to play around with.Use the same tactics for the next girl.She thinks you could be the one,the one that's gonna be that perfect boyfriend.So she waits not wanting to rush with anything.So you play along to see what it ends like.Son of a bitch.Is that you're game,because if it is one day someones gonna beat you.Now I won't say you should burn in hell because i'm not that type of person.And for all I care you can catch a fucking std.Who knows maybe you're dick will magically off.Oh God Let us Pray that it Does.I'll be waiting.People like you will never find you're special someone.Sucks doesn't it.Yea I know.Hmm it feels good to let it out because after the last period of this entry i'll be completely over it ,you're game and You .And when I rip up the last piece of you left i'm gonna unplug you ,you're life from mine entirely.

Do you know a guy that's living on El' Desperato Boulevard.That one guy that spends countless hours looking for a girlfriend on myspace.Sending unwanted comments.Asking for numbers,and if they're lucky they might get one out of the 12 every other month.The sad but almost pathetic part about this is that the girl more than likely gave her number out for pity or because she couldn't find a nice way to say no.She doesn't want you to call her or text her so don't.Just be lucky your ass got the damn number and quit while you're ahead.Those guys that do a little extra because they know they need to ,to "stand out" ....Yeah desperate! So what makes a guy foolhardy .Hmmmm.A guy that can't take a hint.You know that one guy ,that no matter how many different ways you try to end a conversation he always finds something to drag it along.So I'll end this with a word of advise girls don't lead a guy on and guys get a life.

You know what pisses me off? Control freaks.Ugh they drive me nuts,insane,Deranged .I mean they act like they know everything that's everything,and anything that's anything.Assertiveness is the way to go right?The problem is that's something I lack .I'm sure Everyone has seen the episode of Spongebob when he gets "assertive" at least once.I've seen it and although it was very amusing it isn't as easy as it seems .Me? I tend to keep everything in .If somethings wrong you won't find it out from me.Why? I don't know I just don't like talking for myself most of the time.My mom calls it being anti-social.I just call it being quiet.I think sometimes that maybe I need to speak up .But I don't think there's any point because most of the time it makes you look stupid or illiterate.Bye for now there's another pointless blog for you.

Is it just me or do the majority of Asians hang out with Asians?
Like don't get me wrong I love Asians I go to the mall with them in fact one of my best friends is Asian .I'm just saying it's kinda weird .Not weird in a way like when a contortionist (a bendy person) can touch the back of their head to their butt,but weird like how an owl, any owl at that make the same exact sound every time *random I know*
Anyways!
It's like they have an Asian radar or something .In school they surround themselves with themselves . Parties ,There's always that hott Asian guy that all the girls go gaga over ,even though in reality he's trying to scope out that hott Asian girl to dance with.In the halls at school 9/10 of the girls have Asian boyfriends,but they're cute together .And isn't it cool how every Asian somehow knows every Asian. When I talk to my friends from other schools they know all my Asian friends from my school it's funny actually.

Deep.Deep?Deep!
Do you notice that the meaning of deep has been changing everyday.I'm not talking
Kanye' because he's as deep as a puddle of murky rain water,and I'm not talking like some depressed kid that eats his feelings and writes poetry about killing himself. I mean like when you talk to a person and you can just sense how intricate their mind really works.Even without saying something they've said enough.I have met a person or two like that ,but I'm waiting for that one person(male or female) to come and capture my full attention.Give me a conversation that I actually would like to participate in. Are you deep.Are you an Idiot.Questions haha.

"Oh What a Wicked Web we Weave when at first we choose to Deceive"
(Shakespeare)

I learned that yesterday in my acting class.It means if you lie once you're going to have to lie again,and pretty soon it will come back to bite you. I though that was kind of funny because I was just thinking about the liars in my life.Some worse than others.It makes me mad not because people lie ,but people who lie over the dumbest things.Honestly I can forgive you like it's not even the fact that you lie.If I ask you about it I just wanna know not to yell at you just to know.So you should just answer truthfully because if I ask you I already know that you lied.I don't know i'm just over it.

Is it that hard to figure out where you belong?Where you fit in this massive puzzle called Life.Me?I fit no where.Neither do you if you're reading this.I'm what you like to call a floater .I'm that one puzzle piece that got lost after one too many attempts to be put in its place.I mean hey i'm not complaining I enjoy being seen and not heard.It's a very comfortable life style .Think about one day you're hanging with the whack attack.Then, it's with the preppy people,then it's with top knotchers.I mean I don't classify myself as a top knotch glamour chick and I know that my name isn't in the book of Whack Attacks.And if you know me you already know that i'm far from anyone/thing preppy. Sometimes I look at my friends and I think about how they've been where they are since i've met them.They seem content with it but I don't know.I don't feel like this teenage period is for me.I'm beyond the cliques and cliches' .But is it that hard to find a group of friends that think/feel the same .Don't get me wrong the friends i've made are amazing well most of them but I just feel like there's more .Well bye for now.

So ever wonder why when you fall in love life gets worse than it was before .I mean isn't love suppose to Satisfy you,make you feel complete in all the right places.When am I going to be able to hear the words " I love you" and actually believe him. I wish I could say that I love this person knowing that they loved me the same way,but that's life right ? It's not meant to be even.It's like a trash bag too small for the bin.When one side fits the other jumps off.Why can't it be like a movie or a nice romance novel I mean I'd even be happy with those sappy Soap opera love stories.This whole reality thing....Not for me.Chemistry.What we all look for right ? That spark that starts the fire of an OhSoWonderful relationship.But, after this year of watching my friends capture that special someone I've learned that no guy is truly worth it if you don't have to work for it.

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