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Every year my nagging mother gathers the household to talk about resolutions,goals for the new year.And every year she gets the same answer from me ."I don't have any.I go day by day otherwise I'm overwhelmed ."However, does she care? Not in the slightest .I tell her I'm probably going to go to tcc and she yells at me ,but when I ask her to stop being mad she insist on her happiness being over the moon.It will soon end .All of it.....No I'm not going to kill myself ...yet...scared? Anyway enough yanking your chain.I understand that everyone wants to get out of their house and what not.Unfortunately,this is a necessary want so necessary that it's barely a want but dire need.Why? Simple.My partial sanity depends on it.
Once again I'm being dragged to church .Fucking church !On New Years .What the fuck! Excuse me for my excessive use of profanity ...you're welcome to leave.So while I have to read every status on Facebook ,all written by ungrateful children that can't find "what the fucks up with today"
Oh and let's not forget the ever famous."Tryna get fucked up "
"were da hoes"etc .All I'm asking is to be treated like I have an opinion instead of being dragged places.When people ask me ,"Kiani ,what did you do?" All I can do is put my head down and pretend to be deaf.I just want to leave this house .Leave her....To do what ? NO clue ,but I know I won't find it here .February 28,2012 .So close and yet entirely too far.


Anyway knowledge is power and not knowing is just half the battle.

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